Tag: courage

What Happened?

Happy New Year!!! As always, first blog entry for 2019. A tribute to 2018.

So, what happened to your 2018? How was it?

My 2018 was very interesting. It started really exciting especially when I joined a new company.  I mean, that was really a leap of faith for me.  It was a bittersweet decision.

Then, a lot of things happened in between. God’s word for me for 2018 was “courage” and I thought that I would be making a lot of “big” decisions in life and you know probably meet someone (LOL). But, it was a different kind of courageous decision He wanted me to do. And yes, it was more difficult. I struggled with it all throughout the year (until now!). And, I kinda figured it out almost half of the year already.

SLOW DOWN. The two big words that I had to embrace and continue to embrace up to now. I tell you, it is harder than being busy.

My greatest blessing was to be able to spend time with people. My slowing down has allowed me to make more time with people and ministry. Those I can never exchange for anything. Relationships are the most important! And I’m truly grateful that God really allowed that in my life.

Then, my 2018 ended with a surprise. I didn’t know I would reach to a decision to leave the company that I joined early in the year. I feel like I became more brave by doing that. Though, I was confident because I have a Father in heaven who will take care of me no matter what.

I don’t have a list of what’s or what-not’s of my 2018. Just one big lesson that I will have to learn and keep re-learning. To learn to LIVE FOR THE MOMENT.  The reason why God wanted me to slow down. I forgot how it is to appreciate TODAY, embrace the PRESENT, enjoy the NOW.  So, we’ll see!!!

To end, always grateful to God who deserves all glory. I don’t know what 2019 will look like but I know for sure that God will remain faithful.

So, what’s your biggest lesson for 2018?

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Courage to Slow Down

When God answered my prayer to work for a different company, I was very happy and excited. I had been praying for it and this year I just felt that it was the right time. And indeed, God confirmed it. You can read more about that here.

My first few weeks in the new company were just refreshing. It started slow so I got a lot of time to learn and read about the company. As weeks continued to pass, I felt that the pace was still the same. It’s a pace that I was not used to. And it became a struggle for me. Most of us struggle with busyness in our day to day work. I did not know that slowing down would also become a struggle for me.

My heart started to complain. I started to grumble. In all honesty, there was no reason to grumble at all. During those weeks, my mind kept telling me to be grateful because I am very blessed and I am in a very good place. But you see, I entertained discontent in my heart. It was like that for weeks. I was already thinking of not extending my contract. I wanted a working environment that was the same as my previous company. I was struggling to adjust and embrace change.

I became stubborn for those weeks, playing deaf with God’s Word until He had to deal with me. He led me to Numbers 11.

“…but for a whole month—until it comes out of your nostrils and you loathe it—because you have rejected the Lord, who is among you, and have wailed before him, saying, ‘Why did we ever leave Egypt?'” – Numbers 11:20

“Now the people complained about their hardships in the hearing of the Lord, and when he heard them his anger was aroused.” Numbers 11:1

Those verses described me, grumbling and complaining. I was asking God if His answered prayer was really what He wanted for me. I asked God, “Do you really want me to stay?” Very discontent. Very ungrateful.

God’s word for me this year is COURAGE.  I was thinking it was courage for things that He wanted me to pursue this year, courage to pursue bigger things that will help me accomplish my own personal goals. However, God’s thoughts were different. I did not expect at all.

All my grumbling weren’t because of my work. It was my heart. God asked me, Do you have the courage to stay in the company where I put you even if it is an environment that you are not used to and that you will struggle to adjust?

“So if you are tempted to walk away, make sure to seek God, because you never know what he might do if you have the courage to stay. ” – Divine Direction by Craig Groeschel

And He did not end there. Slowing down was not just in terms of work but on everything. I was planning so many things that I just wanted to keep going. I wanted to accomplish a lot that I can’t just slow down. But God wanted me to slow down on everything, no exceptions. And that was the most difficult. I had so many things I wanted to do this year – starting to build my company, starting a business back home. But then God said, drop everything. Pause.

That was it! Courage…to slow down. It’s so hard. I felt like I’m going to run out of time if I pause. I felt like I will be losing my opportunity. But who am I to question God’s ways? I need to be courageous in pursuing a life that takes time to relax, to rest, to think, to reflect, to prepare, to plan.

By God’s grace, I obeyed.

How has it been so far? I’m so happy to say that it has been so liberating. I didn’t know that God can truly give me this season to just enjoy the flowers on the wayside. I am learning to appreciate boredom. I have more time now to reflect. I don’t feel the pressure of making things happen. I don’t think about things that are years and years ahead. I am learning to just think about the next few days. Importantly, I am enjoying this time of letting God use this season of my life for His work.

Indeed, there is a time for everything. We all just need the courage to embrace that.

There is a time for everything,
    and a season for every activity under the heavens:

 a time to be born and a time to die,
    a time to plant and a time to uproot,
   a time to kill and a time to heal,
    a time to tear down and a time to build,
  a time to weep and a time to laugh,
    a time to mourn and a time to dance,
     a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
    a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
     a time to search and a time to give up,
    a time to keep and a time to throw away,
     a time to tear and a time to mend,
    a time to be silent and a time to speak,
     a time to love and a time to hate,
    a time for war and a time for peace.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

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A Prayed Adventure

On the latter months of last year, my daily devotion was about on the life of David. It was during those months that God has impressed to me that my 2018 will be a year that I need to be more courageous. As you know David, he was the young shepherd who fought the giant, Goliath. But, that was just even the beginning of his great adventure. Eventually, he became the king of Israel which required him more courage.

As I was reading David’s life, there is one of the many important things he did that really reminded me of how much I was missing it in my life.

1 Samuel 23 – 2 Therefore David inquired of the Lord, saying, “Shall I go and attack these Philistines?”   3 But David’s men said to him, “Look, we are afraid here in Judah. How much more then if we go to Keilah against the armies of the Philistines?” 4 Then David inquired of the Lord once again.

Then David said, “O Lord God of Israel, Your servant has certainly heard that Saul seeks to come to Keilah to destroy the city for my sake. 11 Will the men of Keilah deliver me into his hand? Will Saul come down, as Your servant has heard? O Lord God of Israel, I pray, tell Your servant.”

1 Samuel 30 – 8 So David inquired of the Lord, saying, “Shall I pursue this troop? Shall I overtake them?”

2 Samuel 2 –  It happened after this that David inquired of the Lord, saying, “Shall I go up to any of the cities of Judah?”

2 Samuel 5 – 19 So David inquired of the Lord, saying, “Shall I go up against the Philistines? Will You deliver them into my hand?”

23 Therefore David inquired of the Lord, and He said, “You shall not go up; circle around behind them, and come upon them in front of the mulberry trees. 

Before David went to battles, he always inquired of God. He showed full dependence on God that before making any move, he wanted to make sure that it was what God was leading him to do.

And as I was reading that, I was rebuked of how I had been making decisions and plans in my life without really inquiring God first.  One of those was my desire to explore work from other companies. It had always been in my plan and every time I start making applications, God would always give me a reason to stay. Clearly, God did not want me that time to leave.

But late last year, I just felt that I really need to start sending my applications again. And because I was reminded of how David inquired God first, I did the same. My way of praying has changed from requesting to inquiring.

To remind myself, I keep an open journal on my bedside table so that I will immediately write down my inquiry before God. Below are the 2 items I listed last October that God has answered early this year which I will also be sharing here how He answered it.

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I worked for/at Best Buy for more than 10 years, including my years when I was still in Accenture. And the reason for me leaving was because I want to know what else is out there aside from the world of retail. I want to grow and learn more from other industries. As I shared in my previous blog, it was bittersweet leaving because of the people.

So how did my new adventure happened? Before I left for vacation last December, I went for an interview for a BA role in a bank. That wasn’t a contract role though. But because it is different from retail, I just decided to give it a try. I was excited about it and was hoping that I will make it. Unfortunately, I got the news that I did not get the job. So,  when I was in the Philippines for my vacation, I just kept praying about a new job. God knows what is best for me, so I trusted Him.

Second week of January  this year was prayer & fasting week. I was very much looking forward to it because I was excited of what God will reveal to me for 2018. I have so many plans for the year but I was just excited on what He will speak to me for the year. And over and over, He would remind me to be “courageous”.

During the middle of the fasting week, I got an unexpected FB message. My former colleague who I really admire as a person sent me a message and asked me if I was interested for a contract BA job. Without second thoughts, I said Yes! Of course!

So, she gave my contact to the hiring manager. Then, everything just happened so fast. I went for an interview, negotiated my contract and I got the job! It was effortless just like when I got the job from Accenture, just like when I got the job from Best Buy. And I knew that it was from the Lord. Because it was well-arranged and the timing was perfect. My former colleague never knew I was looking for a job, a contract job to be specific. But God knew and He can certainly use people in ways you never expect. And as always, if you think God does not care about details, He does. They gave me my asking rate. Just like when I got the job from Accenture and Best Buy. And what’s the other bonus? My new office is so close to my apartment that it only takes me 5 minutes to commute. And on the summer, I can even just walk!

Everything went smooth but it  took me courage to pursue it. It is getting out of my comfort zone and getting into a dimension that I myself acknowledges it is really one of my weakest – the world of finance. 🙂 It is also taking the risk of doing a contract job, not knowing if I will still have a job in the next six months or so. But, God knows my needs. He knows what I can and cannot do. He is my strength and my provider. I am courageous not because of my experience or what I know but because I have a God who is beside me, before me and behind me. I have a God who is all-powerful. He made this happen. He will see me through it. Because He is an awesome God!

Just this week was my first week at the new company. And each day I went to work, I was just in awe and still am of how God just did it. He did it, so amazingly. And I am just truly grateful.

I hope that I have somehow encouraged you. God is a good Father. He does not withhold anything good to His children. And we can only experience Him fully if we entrust our life to His Son Jesus Christ. Because it is through Christ that we are able to receive the promise of abundant life.

God bless you! To God be the glory! Let the future begin!

do what is rightnot what is easy

‘Twas a good year

First blog entry of 2018! Wooohooo! I thought I would be writing more last year as I hope I would, but there was just too much to write that I can’t keep up. LOL…

But of course, I will never start the year without a recap of my 2017 and what to look forward to for this new year.

Last year was about taking more risks, as I wrote in my 2017 first blog entry.

As I mentioned in my previous shares, I am not the type of person that would really take risks. I always want certainty. Every time I make a decision, I always make sure that’s really what God wants me to do. And, God has been so gracious to me that He truly works in my life that way also. He does not allow confusion in my life. He really knows me well. 🙂 It’s always a Yes or No.

Anyway, the risks I was telling you were really more on taking bigger steps on things that I feel like I won’t really be able to do and hoping would have lasting value. And by God’s grace, He enabled me to take some. As I look back now, I don’t know how I could have done it. But He is a good Father. He does not let us stay the same. He wants us to walk by faith. And I always tell God, if He does not want it, then just stop me from doing it. So, I still have to see how things will be. But before I talk about the future, I’d like to share what I had done last year that really made me grow as a person. It may not be risks for you, but me knowing me, I just don’t know how I could have done it. Amazingly, God also uses people to just push you, walk with you, support you, pray for you and encourage you. And, I’m truly grateful for those people!!

My 2017 Risk list… LOL…

1. Push your limit

Every summer, my church friends and I would always try to do a lot of hiking as it’s really the only time of the year we can do a lot of outdoor activities. Years before, we’ve always wanted to go to Wedgemount Lake but the trail is difficult. But, last year we just had to do it. We kinda hesitated but still in the end we found ourselves hiking to the lake. And I must say, it was really the most difficult trail I have done but the view was worth it. Though, I don’t think I will ever do it again. I don’t know how we survived the last part of the trail. I was praying endlessly as the trail was really dangerous. Thank God we made it back down!

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Another physical activity I challenged my self to do was the Rugged Maniac obstacle race. I always enjoyed obstacle races, it’s kinda like Amazing Race. However, the obstacle races I’ve done did not require strength and physical endurance. Those were just for fun. Rugged Maniac might be the easiest obstacle race compared to the other ones – Spartan, Tough Mudder, etc. But for me, it was the most extreme physical activity I’ve done in my whole life. LOL. So, I was kinda scared because I didn’t know if I’ll finish it – whole and safe. It was good because I had girlfriends with me who also joined for the first time. This one, I might do again next time. I really had fun – all mud & falling.

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Another not so physical activity that I had been procrastinating was to take my road test. For one, I never drove in the Philippines. I had some lessons but that’s it. Growing up, our family never owned a vehicle until I graduated from university. But then, I left home and moved to Manila. And living in Manila did not really encourage me to drive also. I don’t think I’ll ever dare. But when I moved here, I realize it’s really about time. I always feel like driving is not for me knowing that I’m no risk-taker. I feel like driving  is a risk…haha! I’m too cautious. It took me a lot of courage. Finally, I took my road test. And of course, I failed. Haha! But then, now I can keep moving. I just have to keep trying until I make it.

2. BIG Decisions

I was never a big dreamer until God showed me that indeed nothing is truly impossible for Him. On the latter part of 2016, I started having the desire to start my own company. This desire started when I realize how unfortunate it is for IT graduates at my hometown, Bacolod City, to not have so many opportunities for them to really work using their degree when they have so much potential. And so, when I went home that year, I asked my college classmates if they are interested to join me. I did not really get any response.  Fast forward next year , 2017. Two of my college classmates wanted to do the same. And so, we gave it a try. March of 2017, we launched our start up company and had our first client. We don’t know how to run a company. But, we do know how to provide service. And for me, that was enough to start. Our start up is based in Bacolod City. It is still struggling but I’m hoping that one day, we will be able to hire so many graduates and help build the IT workforce in Bacolod. Last December, we organized a hackathon event to really see the skills of the IT students. And, I was just impressed of how much potential Bacolod truly has. I really hope more IT jobs will come to Bacolod. And if you know potential clients, please let us know! More clients mean more jobs for the fresh graduates!

I’ve always enjoyed organizing events. God has blessed me with administrative gift that I am able to use it not just in my day to day job but also in ministries. Such a privilege. Last year, I organized two events – one for our church and one for Beautifully Waiting. And of course, I can never do it on my own. The difficult part of organizing is the time of planning and preparing. Last year was really one of the busiest and most tiring at my workplace for me. I was working on a big initiative that I felt like it used up all my mental and physical energy that every time I come home from work, I just want to go to bed. However, I trusted that God would sustain me as I took a step of faith in organizing those events. The good thing about those events were those were God’s events, not mine. And so, I just really surrendered to Him everything. And by His grace, He carried me through until the end. And also very grateful, there were people who were always willing to help. Also, for Beautifully Waiting event, it was my first time to speak and share in an event. When the event ended, I looked back of the journey before the event started and I was just in awe of how God just made everything happen. He did it!

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2017 was just the start of taking risks. This year, God has impressed in my heart that I need all the courage I could have to face all that’s going to happen this year. New opportunities, growth of our start up company, more events to share Jesus and spread His love, bigger decisions, lots of challenges. I told God to allow me to go through so many failures and rejections so that I will be more courageous. I am still that person who gets a little cautious at times. Scared of taking risks. Doesn’t want to take steps of faith. However, with what God had allowed me to go through last year, God showed to me that with the little faith I have, He can use it to accomplish big things. Really, it’s not just me being courageous but it is also because I have a BIG GOD who can do things beyond my expectations.

I know this is a pretty long blog but I hope I have somehow encouraged you, that we can never stay the same as we were years ago. For us to grow, we need to take little steps of faith, take some risks. But make sure, that those are really well-prayed. Prayer is the only weapon you have as you make those decisions.

May you have a courage-filled 2018!  God bless your 2018!

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” – Joshua 1:9

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